Those Magic Moments

You know those moments? The magical ones where you do something really important and all of a sudden you realize just how important it is? And you know how you feel, in your very core, at those moments? All warm and strong and fuzzy inside? Or maybe the feeling is so strong it even gives you goosebumps or makes tears come to your eyes? Well that’s how this journey into farming all began for me.

In 2007, I was a sophomore in high school standing in the front of my Honors English class giving a presentation on Henry David Thoreau’s famous book, Walden. The book is incredibly well written and so, so, beautiful, but it’s also quite difficult to read. Even though the writing was so different from anything I had ever experienced, I was drawn into it through Thoreau’s unique views on life. Nearly every sentence of the book tugged at something inside me and moved me more than I realized. You see, as I presented Thoreau’s powerful message about following dreams, living simply, and not wasting our precious time on this Earth, I got to this quote:

“I went to the woods because I wished to live deliberately, to front only the essential facts of life, and see if I could not learn what it had to teach, and not, when I came to die, discover that I had not lived.” - Thoreau

And, I kid you not, tears started streaming down my face. I didn’t even know I was crying until a girl in front of the class, Ashley, asked me, “Are you crying?”

I was taken aback for a moment. No, of course I’m not crying… but, then I felt them. Tears were streaming down my face. I was immediately mortified for breaking down in front of the class, but I was also amazed at the power Thoreau’s writing had over me. It had struck me deep in my core, and I never realized what his words had come to mean to me. That was one of the most magical moments of my life.

I realized, with tears streaming down my blushed face, that Thoreau’s words were true. I realized that I wanted to uphold those truths, to live my life deliberately, simply, and to the fullest. And I knew that those truths would guide me to the life I was meant to live. The life I wanted to live.

Now, don’t get me wrong, it hasn’t been a straight path to farming. It wasn’t until 2014 that I was really nudged in that direction as I interned with the Chama Peak Land Alliance, a non-profit landowner-led conservation group. I was on a weekend work trip with my boss, Monique, and we were visiting a gentleman who lived in New Mexico for an Alliance project. As luck would have it, he was a New Mexico native and very, very, passionate about working the land, growing food, and sharing it with those around him. I remember this particular magical moment as if it were yesterday.

Monique and I were standing in his backyard garden. It was filled with the largest cauliflower I had ever seen (and have ever seen since), and he was describing how he planted his seeds and the prayer he prayed as he sowed them. I wish I could remember his exact words, but my memory always focuses on the feelings I felt as he spoke. As he shared his planting prayer with us, he passionately told us that he gave away as much food from his garden as he possibly could. After all, he explained, the food wasn’t truly his to begin with. It belonged to his family, to his community. As I listened, it was like something clicked inside of me, as if a dusty old light switch in the basement of my soul had been flipped on and I was able to see again. Once again, I could feel tears surfacing as I listened, and, once again, I remember being a bit embarrassed by the onslaught of emotions his passion evoked. It was a simple, precious, moment, and it stunned me. In that yard in New Mexico, I knew that I was on the right path; I was exactly where I was supposed to be.

A few years later in 2016, I landed an internship at Cure Organic Farm. Jack and I had been talking about having a farm and growing food for a couple of years, and I realized I didn’t have any experience even though I wanted to learn. Serendipitously, we had gone book shopping and I came home with a hobby farming book that suggested looking online for internships or volunteer opportunities, so I jumped on the bandwagon and found Cure. And what an experience. The hours were long, the work hard, but it laid the foundation and connected me to what I had been searching for. I wasn’t just studying the land anymore, like I had in school. I was part of the land. The seed grew because I watered it. The plant grew because I tended to it. The pig ate and drank because I took care of it. I nearly cried when I harvested potatoes for the first time! I LOVED those potatoes. They were purple jewels emerging from dark earth, and they touched me more than I thought a simple potato ever could. It was like I had unearthed a mighty treasure from the cold, dark ground. I was finally a part of a cycle that was missing in every other job or thing I had done before. I wanted to be in the cycle. I wanted to be the conductor of the land. To watch it grow, tend to it, and eat from it. I wanted all of it. And farming brought it to me.

These magic moments are precious and fleeting in time, remarkable in the power they exert over our lives. They are tiny things that turn into a lifetime of memories; they define who we are and who we become. It is only when we are present enough to notice these moments that we can truly learn from and take guidance from them. They lead us to our best lives. I am so grateful for all of the magic moments I have experienced in my life so far, and I am especially grateful for the ones that have led me to where I am, conducting and learning from this land I live on today.

Until next time,

Farmer Kinzie